529. It's Official::: I Have the CRICs Disease (Chronically shifting Relativistic Identity CrisiS)... As I've Always Had, But Now Officially Diagnosed

Though I get along best (and most strongly affiliate myself)
with Environmental Historians,
a rogue group of human-environment synthesizers, indeed,
I find it extremely difficult to call myself an "Environmental Historian."
I think academic disciplines are sooo retro, sooo old school,
sooo collapsing Tower of Babble Syndrome,
that with today's cumulative, interrelated problems,
I think that the next hot and fashionable and sexy and NEEDED
thing to do is to be some kind of unclassifiable, free-range intellectual,
so versatile in thinking and feeling,
that you can maneuver deeply into the minds
of any intellectual you encounter, whether at the bar
or a grocery store or a university campus.
And that there are no arbitrary rules or conventions
or terms of agreements or strings attached
that control your thoughts and actions,
except that you're on an ultimate quest, an ultimate purpose
to ask the most pressing questions, seek the most profound answers
that guide daggars to the root guts of all disciplines,
splice and reweave their messy, bloody cores
to a new, workable whole of self and one's place in the universe,
to satisfy the metaphysical (abstract) and the practical,
and solve real problems, for personal sanity
and self-constructed world order.
Or then, is this pursuit all just a self-indulgent video game,
all constructed in my mind?

So, you'd think this profession described above would be
called "philosophy," but you're wrong,
because it turns out in the so-called university "philosophers"
are actually studying the brains of dead philosophers
who passed away +200 years ago
rather than observing and experimentally interactiong
with the world, pursuing their own sense of contextual self.

But just in case, if you really do want to know
how I do classify myself, I'm actually
a biologist who loves rocks and studies humans.
I survive, I replicate, therefore I am.
(as Descartes rolls in his grave).
And therefore... I'm a biologist.
It's by default; I can't change the fact that I'm an organism.
That I'm life. That I'm a sack of chemicals
encased in a gooey membrane that detects
and responds to my environment such as to keep
me--the sack of chemicals--in one functional piece.
Heck, I was born that way!

(Disclaimer: As you can see, I find poetic comfort in the mechanical,
machinist "scientific" description of the world.
Other post-modernists would critique that my definition of life--
sack of chemicals that replicates, etc--is so "cold" and robotic.
I find it so invigorating and so paradoxical
that it's flipping cool to just think that I'm merely a sack of chemicals.
For me, it takes a heavy load off of thinking of the
"true meaning of life," because in the end,
it's all pretty straight forward...
if you decide to see it that way).

Other Blogs/Files that are precursors to the CRICs disease::: Blog 135 (Discrimination Against Difference), key words: intellectual identity, individual intellectual identity, Vic's list of resumes on the right hand side of Biologically Incorrect, Vic's Long PDF and Vic's Short PDF...

277. Preparation for The Elephant and the Oak Tree: Baggage / Behind-the-Scenes Images of Ants and Oaks

Below is a collection of images that will not be manifested in "The Elephant and the Oak Tree" parable. They were nevertheless influential stepping stones to the ultimate creations!
The cutest cartoon image of an ant I could find. I vaguely remember this character as a kid. Is this a Warner Brothers creation?

The body formation of the Warner Brothers ant is very human-like. I tried creating such an ant with such a morphology, but acquired too much anxiety from making the structure to humanoid. The face totally works, just not the rest of the body. I think the Warner Brothers creature above needs an extra set of appendages... that would be more convincing. What a concept, design of evolution through cartoons! I have ultimate evolutionary control of the morphologies of my organisms! And they can evolve overnight, not in a million years!
I always appreciate BC. I used to read these cartoons more when I had time to. My grandfather would collect them for me and I would cut out my favorite cartoons and pictures. That hobby is done and over with. Unfortunately, there are more pressing issues in society to deal with. I love the simple design of the ants. They are very comical, amplified by the big eyes and big nose. I also like the message of the cartoon. Kids exist to keep adults in check. I think kids are sane and adults are insane and that sometimes the kids should be teaching the adults than visa versa. I think it should be more of a two way street of communication across the ages!
Of course, I must account for the anatomy of ants if I want to be a good evolutionary designer of ants!
The best image of "real" ants I could find on the web. I admire the dramatic poses and it is of my curiosity to investigate such postures and their implications for insect communication. (Opa! There goes my "biology hat" on my head!).
Early cartoon ant I drew. Don't like it. The xss is goo big. Ahem. Abdomen. Whatever. Now my "biologically incorrect cartoonist hat" is on, pissing off my biologist part of my brain!

This ant head is cute, but I still don't like it. Looks too much like my squirrel drawings.
I am disturbed by the proportions of the head size to body size. The overall structure of the ant doesn't make it seem like this ant is very "flexible" and can be posed in too many positions. Looks too chunky.
I LOVE the facial expression of the ant and the reflection effect of the mirror, but still the body is way to chunky and I cringe thinking there's lots of juice and half-formed organs without a backbone inside.
This is a charming image of an oak tree I drew a few months back. I have nothing to complain. I may use the image, or I may not.
Same oak tree. Black and white.

I made a decision that I will not focus on making cartoons for the book this round. The most important concern is that I create an overarching cartoon that can summarize the entire story in one page, which will end up being on the title page. I anticipate making one additional variation of the parable, one that is more detail-oriented and adult like. The other story is stripped down to simpler language... minus details... and is more for kids up to high school students.

I am imagining the ultimate. What if I had a "charming," simple little story in a tiny, Hallmwark size pocket book that could be passed out to every little kid on this planet. The story tells them a simple message to doubt what you learn, and you must put it together yourself, your relations to your surroundings--the big picture. The kids themselves could clean up the education system. The kids themselves can start having a vision since the beginning of their ability to read, to make this world a better place--rather than being drowned by Disney Disillusionment! It's self-perpetuating! Wow. I hope this story becomes a needed "behavioral ecological mutation" for society. What a dream. One day. I think this book can give me the license to be a "guest speaker" to schools and stuff. Even to return to my high school and give a talk there. The Elephant and the Oak Tree is a story that will give me hopes and dreams, and will open the door for me in terms of communicating with people about all the issues that concern me and are bottled up inside.

I saw blips of Who Moved My Cheese and The Iceberg is Melting, parables about how corporations should deal with change. My parable is about how to deal with change, but with a VERY different recipe, and from an ENVIRONMENTAL and PSYCHOLOGICAL perspective, not corporate. Or so I think the recipe is different. I have to take a closer look. I was frustrated by the Iceberg story. It was written in such simple language, and it was written more like a salespitch than an adventure. It just didn't appeal to me. The cartoons were NOT cute, and NOT cool. The penguins looked boring and had no emotional read on them.

Then again, the likelihood anything like this will happen is close to zero. It will most likely become another buried story in history. Oh well. People will acknowledge my existence when I am dead. Acknowledge it and get over it. But I just need to move on to my next projects for sanity!